The Hope Giving Light... By L. Rutledge 2011

I am a man who does not handle the space of loneliness well at all.
I reach for another to feel like i live. I keep a place inside for only one soul to live.

I thought i had the one and only. She was not. It ended badly like all of my loves do. I was cold and i felt blue far away from heaven i felt untrue. I lost my self and i was a fool.

I reached out to my faith and was not sure. I asked God for a love that will be true and love me for all that i am. I know he knows just what i am inside but sometimes it seems like he can not hear my cry's. I looked and looked but the hearts i choose were not right. I gave it to my sister to see if she could find someone who was right. She choose someone so beautiful that i felt unworthy. I pushed my self and made the call. She answered back and was so kind and gentle. She made me smile and laugh all the time. She became my best friend and gave me her love and devotion, She wanted to be mine. She loved me the way i always dreamed to be loved. She is just what i prayed for all the time. 

Little time has passed since my heart was broke . I know the light better through the darkest time alone. I know God hears and listens to me. I know because he gave this beautiful woman to me just when i gave up on me. Now i have my perfect dream coming true with everyday her light shines through. I know where its going and I know where I've been. This beautiful woman is a gift to me from heaven.

Dedicated to Olivia
by L. Rutledge 2011

The Loss Of The Tide Of Dagon.... By L. Rutledge

It was a dark night and what a fog there was. The men abroad the tide of Dagon where very tired after a long day of plundering treasures and far sailing into the night. I was awake due to an uneasy dream I had. It was of blackness in a near future of some sort. I could feel a deep void of sickness and decay just beneath the surface of my mind. I did not want to sleep again that night for fear that I would be taken by some kind of creature beneath the tides of the sea. I feel there is a curse up one us after such a long life of steeling and murder. I am no saint that is for sure.

The fog in the night made the men of this pirate shop tired in an unnatural way. The captain of our ship was none other then the great Clive Killien a tall man of pale white skin and black hair. He was said to have been good friends with black beard but no one really could say. I would not cross him though. I have seen the man kill before and what a sight it was. The way he cut off the head of men that would stand against him. Most times it was in some damned drinking hole where sailors were often known to go. Captain Killien was a real devil when it came to hording loot and plundering rich men’s castles in the night.

Now it was late the night that our world had gone to hell. It was like this that the story went. The tide of Dagon vessel had been at sea not long before being over come by the fog that made the ship seem lost in the void of silence. We sailed slow but could not see a single thing due to no moon in the night. Then the ship ran aground. There was not supposed to be an island but yet there was. Captain Killien made men get out and check what the land mass was that we had come up on. Those men found that it was a black beach. The sand black as the very night we were in with no moon. The ship was stuck and could not move so Captain Killien made all of us men get off the ship and make a fire somewhat in land where there was a small grouping of trees. The trees where dead as could be but the wood burned like hell fire. We all made best of the night as the men got drunker and drunker as we watched the fire burn.

Now in the morning I awoke to James, a good friend of mine. He said the captain wanted to have us bury the treasures we had previously come up on after killing the sailors of another vessel at sea. We took everything from them all kinds of gold and silver we found. It was a great take for us all. The Captain was pleased by that. We had a grand time after we got all the loot aboard our vessel. There was drinking and lots of smoking. We made a great deal of loot so we had need of a place to hide it where no one would look.

This island would make for a great place to hide all our takes. Now when we all gathered together and began digging we noticed a smell of rot. It was such a smell of rotten decay that the men named the island Wormwood. I could not imagine what brought such a foul stench up on the earth.  We still kept on digging though. The Captain stood watch over the work as the morning rain began to poor down up on us. Soon there cam a fog of sorts. It came from within the hole we were digging. It was not fog though. It was steam. It was hot there and the men began to notice that the earth was slowly moving open so the hole was getting bigger. The Captain yelled stop!! The men stopped at that moment and noticed the dirt it self was alive. I picked some of the dirt up as the rain fell over it. In my hand there lay soil but not at all. It was small, small little crab like creatures, Millions of them moving like some evil not known to men’s eyes since the dawn of the devil. I threw the damned thing to the ground and looked up to see the men where also noticing the same creepy things. James looked over and said it is evilness. We should have not come on to this island and dug to hide our loot. The Captain laughed and called James a damned fool.

The Captain said burry the treasure. The men continued and James did too knowing that the men would just laugh at him if he spoke more. The men just thought that the dirt was covered in small insects or something. They did not let it stop them. As the treasure began to cover over with the living dirt. The steam of the rain hitting the inner earth had become unbelievable. Then in an instant it all went wrong.

One of the men’s feet dropped into a loose spot of ground and he could not get his foot out. Others helped him but then he screamed out in horrid pain. He said it burns! Captain Killien came to the man and said quiet your self fool. The man was clearly in very bad pain as if something beneath the ground was pulling him in as it burned him alive. We all tried to pull the man but still it sucked him down slowly. It was unbearable to watch as the man screamed tell he had no breath to live. He fell into the dirt and then he was sucked into the mud by some evil thing beneath the ground.

The captain stood in shock as to what he saw. The crew began to tremble with fright. Then the ground gave way where the treasure was burred and there was a gapping hole where fires rose up from within the earth. Lots of men died there. The fire had some kind of control and could suck them in despite their fight to get away. Then I ran but fell to the ground when the land shook like some kind of unearthly quake. I looked back and seen some kind of sea creature come out of the mud and fire. It had a face of a giant fish creature and arms and legs of almost human design. It ate the men that it could get its claws on with its giant razor teeth. It was as big as the trees near by. This was not a creature of God but a demon out of the hells of the under earth.

I seen the Captain give fight to the beast with his sward but was ripped to sheds by the creatures raging claws. I got up and ran to try to get away. I was running with James but I heard him fall and then I heard his screams not long after. Me and some other men where running back to the ship when some kind of monsters in the trees came down and picked the men off one by one into the trees as they screams in horror. I felt my death was near but still I ran faster and faster tell I cam to the beach where I saw the ship. I was almost to the ship when I saw it. It was something of magic to the eye. It brought more terror to me then all the other doom that had rot from this place. There were shining silver wheels in the sky. They shot light down to me through the rainy cloudy morning day light. I could not move.

The silver metal shields were everywhere. They spun but stayed afloat in the air like they were hung there but still they moved freely. I heard voices in my mind that where not mine. The voices I could not understand but I knew that they where not of this earth. I gave up in that moment. I thought I was surely lost for there was to much evil here on this island. I was out numbered by unbelievable things of which the mind has not known of tell this very moment.

I thought to my self about how we were curse by our evil works as pirates, I went limp with utter hopelessness. I looked up once more to see what fate was coming to me. I was shocked at that moment when I was dropped from this evil light to my knees. I saw a light so bright above the shining metal shields. It had power over them. It drove them into the sea and out of sight. Then the burst of light went out. I was alive and free to escape the evil of the place that had doomed my whole crew. I went aboard the tide of Dagon and dropped a small boat into the sea. I got into it and paddle out to sea in hopes that a near by vessel would see me and take me away from this doomed place…

Writen By L. Rutledge 4-16-2011

Left alone with sadness of loss.... By L. Rutledge

There is love in this word but where, is the one true question? Left alone in a room of blacking sorrow due to the loss of that one true love that I gave all my heart too. The question of why? Spin’s round and round within this saddened heart of mine. Why did it need to end? Why did she have to go? I am left here again with this damn lonely soul of mine. I want to run free out side in the sun with a smile brought forth by a woman’s love in my soul next to me. I want the goodness everyone else seems to already have. Me I'm without. Me I'm without the candle that lights the path to a life long reason to go on. To me love is true purpose and reason for a day to day existence. For me she was always my goal and my hope. Alone I sit and mope in a useless state where no one could ever want me. This is sadness due to loss of love.

I can not blame her for my own sorrow. It was me who devoted my self to her whole life. It was I that envisioned a life with her as my wife. I must have pushed to far beyond the point of what she wanted. I was selfish in wanting a woman to be mine and mine alone. I can not hate her for giving up on me. I am a broken man from all the others who said they loved me back before she came along. I was praying to God to let her be the one who will call me home when the day is done but she must not be the one for I am alone tonight and she is gone away from my soul.

A man with nothing can hope for greatness like everyone else in the world but when he try’s to hold greatness and knows it in his heart then looses it. That is the hardest to take. I have known true love and have held it in my heart but lost it. These Four walls seem to be my prison and loneliness is my sentence for which I will not know when I will go free from this prisons walls. Loss of love is a pain that moves with the body and seems to take all your mind with it. I cry sometimes when the lonely part of my heart ache’s. I have not a soul to go to that will really give me peace like she did when she smiled and told me how much she loved me. I hate to write these words down but it is my only way to leave the pain behind somewhat. I don’t think it will truly go away even if I was to write of heaven and how the angel’s have loved us with God’s hand on my shoulder. I just can not find comfort in nothing. I do not want you to feel sorry for me though. I have had this pain before but I thought it was gone when she came along. I thought life would grow into a beautiful one when I heard her say she wanted to love me forever. Forever is gone now. Now it’s back to the blackness of sorrow.

I will not do what most do when sorrow gets too great though. I will not kill this body of mine. I will not forfeit a life God gave to me. I just have to find a reason to live. I will look for my reason and hope that maybe that one true love will come back to my heart so I can stand again as a man with reason. It is in a woman’s heart that I have my life. I am the only man I know who would rather be married then be single but that is me and that will always be the best part of me. I will go to bed now and hope to sleep without that sorrow hanging in my heart. If only she was there. If only she would wake me with her smile by my side. If only she would be there with me to kiss away my sadness and the tears. I guess I will try not to think of it to save my soul from darkness. I will try not be left alone with sadness of loss…   

The Opening statement of my new story...

There are things not known to the still young human race of this world. Things that have not shown them self to our sight. Such things that would being about certain doom if they are brought forth by the unearthing of such old secrets. We the race of men are given to the idea that we rule all the world as we see it, but the world of old has heard the very same echo’s long ago before the end of older races of beings. Beneath the sea lies much that is unknown to us like the heavens of space above full of wonder and mystery. It is best that man not know the grand secrets hidden from the knowledge  of our world…

There it is the very mysterious opening statement of my new story I'm still working on. I love how that sounds. I am very happy with the out come of that first opening. I wanted to write something deep and old and even scary to a point. I sure got that and more when I wrote that. I just hope I can keep up the mystery and interest of the story. I just had to post that because to me that is the whole reason for writing. To capture the mystery and wonder element with in a story. I will continue to try to keep that momentum through out the whole story so you as the reader will maybe enjoy my story's and want more. Well that's all for now talk to you again soon.

The pre-production of an old kind of story...By L. Rutledge

I am working on a story very different from my eternity story. I am working on a story that takes place in the old times back when the world was at war with the Nazi's. It is called "WERMUT" which means WORMWOOD in German.

it will be my kind of version of a H.P. Lovecraft style story. This story is creepy and old fashion like King Kong in a way. The story will follow a navy man who's ship is taken over by the Nazi troops and taken to a mystery island where he and his navy crew are put into prison camps. He will escape at some point and then find out the secrets of why the island is not on any maps. It will be scary what he finds out about the island and what lives beneath it. I like those old fashion mystery island story's from when the world still had mystery in it. I also like monster movies from the old days. I am really into H.P. Lovecraft's work lately so I have to try to make a story with the kind of creepy old school idea's he used to use in his deeply imaginative story's.

 

The story of WERMUT will tell a tale that leads into the real world in a way and it will bring the real world and fiction world together so you will feel the story is leading up to my Eternity story. So it takes place in the same universe or world that story came from. I really like telling survival story's in a way so that is why I'm doing this story. Do not think though that the story will go the same as Eternity did. WERMUT is a lot darker and creepier. I want it to stick in people's mind's as a journey from war to survival from creature's the likes of which man has never seen before. Well anyway the story is in pre-production in my note book right at the moment and should be about 5 or 6 page's long I think. I have trouble writing long story's so that is why it will be short but it will have the ability to continue in some ways later on in the form of other story's like it. I had to at least let who ever view's my blog here know this so you will come back again some time to read other story's of mine when i post them. So now you know I'm working on the story you will see on here next. OK thank you for viewing my blog. Hope you enjoy this preview into my next idea of a story. Thanks for stopping by.

Eternity (Short version) By L. Rutledge 2011

I am here but not. In a place were light is life. the void of darkness came and burned through the land with its sickness. The ones that live follow that of which they fear. They gave up their rights to be granted eternal life for the sinister forces of that world. The rapture never happened then and so they live with the terror of the creatures of hell reaching out to feed on their very souls. I tell you now the short story of two souls who still had the value of God in their hearts. God save them for they are almost all that is left of a race of human that once lived in peace across the world before the blackness was on high.

Mike was the name of the man that lived with God still within his heart. He was just a man with sin like all. He had the will and faith to know what was wrong with the world. He was not easily confused by the devil and his hordes. He could see the sickness as it was past from each person to the next victim of sin on high. He was in all a good man with care and compassion. So it was that he lived alone in a small town in Minnesota. The USA was his country but he did not love it. For it was the land where all freedom was lost to the new world empire of the darkness. The world is at this point in decay and rot of all that once was. Sex and violence are one and the same on the streets and murder is done in the light of day for all to see. Wickedness and perversion of body and soul is everywhere among the people. Food and water is poison and the love of God is a crime above all. The world has turned inward on its self and was being eaten by Satan and his monsters from the deep points of the inner earth. The creatures were freed when the earth and the stars were right at the dark point of time in history. Even history burns now. Erasing its self from mans mind and books.

Mike went from town to town lost and not knowing where his place was in this world. He dared not say much to anyone because he had the light of God within him. The people of the towns would crucify him for his faith in God and Jesus. He just moved on with the faith inside him all alone. He seen the murders and the treatment of the people of this world from day to day. It was numbing to him. He kept hope in his heart for God to give him a person to be with him to have the same light within. He quietly prayed that person would be a woman of God but did not want to hope for to much since it seemed all women of this world were witch's of trickery and lies. He had seen so many lost and so much turned against God. He simply thought that he was in hell and he was suffering for his sin's from before all this. He took his punishment as a chance to become more faithful and prove to God that he was still good to see the heavens gates. It was no punshment though. It was just the time before the coming of Christ.

Day by day he moved on as if he was looking for that right soul that would be his partner in this world. Hope was low in ever finding it. It is a dark world not because of lack of light but because of lack of God's light. These people are starving to death because they live without the wards of God. They don't know it because they have been deceived by the devil so well. To these people the lord is him. He was the one who said it was OK to do all the things the people kept inside wanting to do so badly. He freed them all from the ward of SIN. He told them that through science there is no real sin. It is natural to want the things they wanted. So with that sin was wiped off the earth but it was still in the rules of God. So God looked bad to these twisted souls. That was how God was lost to the men of earth. It was all a great big trick. So now all is lost it would seem.

One day when running from the killing in the streets of men mike ran to hide in a sewer below the street to find a woman crying. She was named Grace. She was good and all alone so he took her with him on his journey to find reason. She told him she wanted to go to where she grew up to spend her days on earth. Tell God comes to set all that is wrong right. Mike decided that he would make it possible for her. He would protect her from all the damned souls and take her there. So they began the journey to the small cabin she loved as a child. She told him much about it along the way. They became so good of friends along the way. She was to him a gift from God. He seen her as a sign that God is still looking to the earth for good souls. So mike gave his devotion to God to get this woman to the place where she felt the world would be right.

They traveled for months and along the way survived the terror of the hell on earth. In that time they became very much in love with each other. She loved him so much now and so did he of her. They kept the wants of each other inside without speaking of it. They were afraid of what would happen if they made it known to each other. They slept apart from each other and acted as friends but they both knew of the feelings inside. It was hard enough knowing the end is near but to fall in love before the end of the world would be pointless. That is what they both thought. It was so hard on them knowing of that though. So they kept on with the journey and pushed aside the feelings.

The road to the place where they would find happiness was hard and long. There was much to see and deal with along the way but they forced there body's forward in hopes that it was going to be a place of peace in the end. They seen the signs in the sky and in the world along the way of the doomed world that they lived in. Sometimes they talked of what it was like before all the darkness when light brought love and happiness to children of God. Now it seems they are all lost and confused to the point of forgetting all that mattered before. It hurts inside to know that all these people have given up on love and life. It used to be so beautiful here when hope fed the world its needs and wants. Where did it all go? Where has peace gone too. These were all things that mattered in both Mike and Graces hearts.

After so many months of travelling together through hell they finally arrived at the small cabin she remembers from her childhood. They came to it and seen it was void of people and any evil things. It was a simple little cabin house next to a great big lake where it seemed to look like the sea or ocean when they looks across it. They felt like it was the last place on earth where peace could be found. In the love of that moment they looked at each other with love in their hearts. No words where spoken though. Mike said we made it grace what now? She smiled at him knowing the love in his heart. She had a tear fall down her cheek then. She wanted to be with him there for forever and ever. She had all she ever wanted with him and that old cabin house. She wanted nothing more then what was there before her right then. Mike seen the tear as it turned to tears. He held her close and hugged her so tight. He told her not to cry. Soon it will all be over and they would be on there ways to find out if there will be a place for them in heaven. She said I don't worry about the gates of heaven. I worry that you will never say you love me. He leaned in at that moment and told her how much he loved her in her ear softly. He told her of the feelings he held secret inside for so long. She cryed more. Out of pure joy of knowing the love he had for her inside. See she knew he loved her but she never heard it spoken to her through out all the journey so it meant so very much to her heart now to know it for sure. She said it to him, She told him she loved him so much for so long. It was a long journey and many nights she slept alone with him in the other room standing guard for her. Not one night did he spend next to her in bed holding her in his arms so she would feel his closeness and know he felt the love she had for him.

The two of them then went inside the cabin and from then on they talked like lovers to each other. After all the months that had past during there journey it was like they where almost husband and wife. They had the time behind them in knowing each other and still never had the rights to touch because they where not married. There were no men of God to marry them so how would that ever happen they thought.

Grace slept alone well mike stood guard once more and hours past. He went out to the lake in front of the house and stared out at that water shining under the moon lit sky. He stood there for what seemed like hours but was really minutes. He had been thinking of what will happen now that they are there. He could not stop from thinking about marriage to grace though. How could they marry without anyone to do the work of doing so. Who in this world would be of God to do this? He kind of became upset about this and turned to go back inside the house. Then he heard some kind of voice speak from out of the wind. He turned back to see a man on the lake standing on the water. He had fear right then. He did not know what to make of it. The man spoke and he listened. The man said that when the morning sun rises the two of them would be as one under God. The man said though the time is almost right for renewal you and her will have each other as Adam had Eve so long ago. He told Mike that the light will fall soon up on the land and the wars will be wiped clean from this world. Mike asked with fear of asking to much but did so anyway. What of her and I then. What will happen when your light comes to this world? The man said no Mike it is not my light it is yours. It is out of faith in I that you will be granted the path that you have suffered so much to see. You and Grace will walk with me then. In that very moment Mike fell to his knees with tears in his eyes for he knew the man he spoke to then. It was Christ the king. He had come back and he was preparing his people for the time was near. Mike spoke no more then. He cryed so hard as if the tears were cleaning his soul of sin. Christ smiles to him. He told him in this very moment all around the world the souls of God are hearing me speak to them much like you are my son. Then just as he came he was gone. Mike stayed there in tears and then the sun began to rise and it shined on the lake and blinded him a bit with its brightness then he heard Grace. She came to him and knelled down to him. He went to explain but she said no. You need no words I know the things you have seen and heard. He said really? She said yes... Now kiss me my husband. He kissed her lips with the passion of a man long spent alone. They stayed in the arms of each other from then on all that day. They wondered of what was happening around the world with Christ being here again.

They talked into the night and then they slept together as man and wife then on. The sleep was so peaceful knowing that the world was being fixed now by the angels of heaven. They went for days like this talking all days and sleeping together every night without fear of any evil or harm being done to them. Mike did start to wonder though. When will the light come down to us at the end? When will it come? He felt like the time was close when he and Grace would walk with Christ. He did not wonder to much though for he had a new wife to love and wanted the time to be spent with her. They both wondered how it would be to walk with the king. They talked about it more and more as days pasted. They just wondered what work was being done to the world at that very moment. It was so quiet these days. It was like all sound had left the world but there words.

That very night as they slept there was a sound like wind out side that became louder and louder tell it woke them both. They knew what it was then. They know it as if it was with them always. They walked out of the house and out to the lake to see the light in the night was coming down to the lake like a funnel of light poring white fag out over the lake. It became light as day and all the white made them close their eyes. They could now see with their eyes closed like the body was not able to cast a shadow no longer. They held hands as they walked into the lake but they did not sink into the water. They were walking on the water. The water was so bright now from the light that it looked and felt like sand beneath their feet. they did not walk long before they seen the shape of a man again. It was Christ like he promised. They walked with him as if he was an old friend from a life time of knowing him. He told them of the city's in heaven and of the things that they will see. Mike and Grace no longer had body's but souls. They had made it to heaven. They seen the sights of things no man could imagine. The world of pain and suffering had pasted and now the treasures of good works that they did in life were their's to know. So it was then that the world would be renewed so that someday life could come back to it. Satan was now chained and prisoned for his evil works upon the earth. Peace had come to all the souls that waited for his coming. He came and all was right again. So there was no more pain or hurt and all the love that ever had been had now been in all the land from then on into Eternity...    

Story by L. Rutledge 2011 Please feel free to commit on this post or story if you like. Thank you for viewing it so much.